Chris (right after Game 5 of Cavs/Celtics): Wow the next 48hrs of hype is fuckin monstrous. Lebron playing for his season. Maybe his last game in a cavs uniform. Supposed to be his year (just like last year which everyone forgets but whatever). Et-fuckin-cetera. If the cavs don’t pull this series out, the chatter will mostly consist of 2 angles I believe. The debate will be whether or not it was his elbow, or was his supporting cast just not … Read More »

Luke: Are we looking at a potential point guard Renaissance? Chris Paul, Deron Williams, Rajon Rondo, Derrick Rose, Russell Westbrook + exciting starts to the careers of Tyreke Evans, Brandon Jennings, Stephen Curry and Darren Collison + John Wall and Ricky Rubio entering the league soon (not saying there’s any indication they’ll be great, just saying the promise they’ve shown makes them relevant for this hypothetical). In the 90s it was bigs, in the 00s it was swingmen. Maybe the … Read More »

Luke: Sidetrack to free agency. Specifically a hypothetical that has already been completely squashed. Why bother talking about it? I think it would dramatically change the course of NBA events for the next 10 years. I’m talking about… Bosh to the Thunder. I think bosh would make the thunder an outer title contender on their way to being one of the favorites the following year. It will always be tough to get past the lakers, but their two best players … Read More »

Chris (April 19 3:49 pm): Quick thoughts from the wknd- Good job by artest and the whole team on durant. He’ll get his points, just need to make him take a lot of shots to get them. Very curious to see how the kid responds in game 2. Russ westbrook is a man. Quickly becoming one of my favorite non-lakers in the league. Who is this KG? Kind of feel like he’s an old dog that needs to be put … Read More »

We’ve been emailing each other. It looks like this: Chris: Let’s get some nba playoff chatter goin here-its fuckin big-as of saturday somethings on tv every night for the next 2 months-by the time its all over we may be living in different states-or different continents-who knows-no time for sleep-only thing that would make this email sequence better is if we included jason whitlock So what we wanna start with? -lakers crawling in-durants 1st playoff-is the west wide open-can any … Read More »

A recent text message conversation about what it would be like to punch LeBron James: LH: I’m not sure but I feel like if I punched lebron in the chest it would hurt my hand more than it hurt him. CH: I think so too but try it anyway.

Biggie Smalls – Love No Hoe This song came out over the summer when Notorious came out. It’s an unreleased demo track. Biggie was one of the best storyteller’s hip-hop has ever seen (this list coming soon), and this is, as far as I know, his first story on wax.

Sometimes when I watch the Pistons I wonder, “What was Joe Dumars (Pistons GM) thinking?” I don’t mean that in an attacking way. It’s more out of curiosity. I’m curious if he thought he would be able to sign a superstar free agent in the infamous summer of 2010 or if it was always his plan to try to steal some guys in 2009 when other teams wouldn’t want to sacrifice their cap room (he got Ben Gordon and Charlie … Read More »

A recent text message conversation about the Lakers and Celtics that took place during their recent showdown: CH: “I’d trade bynum for perkins in a second.” LH: “Says the guy who put Lindsay (spelled it wrong) Hunter on his all-decade team.” …a few minutes later… LH: “I get the celtics. They were so good because they had 3 #1 guys. Then they had a 1, 2, and 3. Then the 2 got hurt so they had just a 1 and … Read More »

Apparently I wrote this before the All-Star break (but if it ends up being completely wrong then I have no recollection of writing it): This is me taking an unnecessary risk because we’re going to figure this out soon enough, but I’m too anxious to get out in front on this one. Darren Collison has been pretty sick-nasty over the last seven games (19.3 points, 9.6 assists, 3.7 rebounds), all of which he has started in the place of the … Read More »

A text message conversation about a possible Nate Robinson trade: LH: My sources say knicks close to deal that sends nate rob to boston. CH: I knew that a few hours ago–my sources say fuck your sources. LH: My source is Brian Windhorst from the Cleveland Plain Dealer. That’s an inside joke I have with myself. CH: I’m sure it’s really funny. LH: My sources confirm that.

I was duped. Amongst all the NBA hype on tv this weekend, one that I was especially excited for was TNT’s ‘all-decade team’. Clearly any chance to see the best of the best in my favorite league judged, and classified into an elite group, gets my juices flowing. My boy Adam even suggested last week that I put my own all-decade team together to see how it compares with the TNT version. Ends up, the TNT show was an award … Read More »

Sorry we’ve been on hiatus lately. Luke was in LA, Chris was transitioning into the latter half of his Showtime years, and then we had to give this annoying chick directions to Firefly (inside jokes are awesome). ANYWAY, we’re back now, and better than ever(ish). Here are our quick hit thoughts on Super Bowl 44/XLIV(?): Satisfying super bowl. A great game 3 years in a row. Couldn’t believe how fast the game was moving either. Very clean. Only a few … Read More »

For Tyreke Evans, it might cost. Tyreke is being sued for his involvement in a drive-by shooting that took place in January 2009. (Wait…what?!) I know!!! January 2009!!! As in, the middle of his freshman season at Memphis! Apparently Tyreke was driving the car from which his younger brother opened fire and killed someone (this detailed report is brought to you by our revered journalism squad). Check out a more comprehensive version of this story from the Philadelphia Inquirer: http://www.philly.com/philly/sports/82069687.html … Read More »

If the voting for the 2010 NBA All-Star game ended today, the starting fives would look like this: East: Dwyane Wade, Allen Iverson, LeBron James, Kevin Garnett, Dwight Howard West: Kobe Bryant, Tracy McGrady, Carmelo Anthony, Dirk Nowitzki, Amar’e Stoudemire Now, I have a feeling there are people who would have a problem with these lineups. There are some people I know and some sports media figures I read/hear/watch that expressed disappointment in these potential lineups and lineups of past … Read More »

Remember the opening scene in the movie ‘The Last Boy Scout’? In case you don’t, there was a football game. One of the players gets the ball, and while running towards the end zone, takes a gun out of his pants and starts shooting other players. Then, after scoring, puts the gun to his head and kills himself. Pretty dramatic (although crazy) opening scene. As we sit here today, I have to ask the question, ‘How far off are we … Read More »

Derrick Rose is good. Tyreke Evans is good. John Wall is probably going to be good. What do these guys have in common other than being good? They were all coached by John Calipari. What will they probably all have in common by May 2010? They will have all only played one year of college ball before entering the NBA. And I’m all, “WTF?!” I’ve always supported kids who stay in college to improve their game even when they are … Read More »

FRESH TO DEATH Indianapolis Colts– Peyton is officially better than Matt Leinart. New Orleans Saints – Some people say it’s better to lose a game during the regular season so the pressure doesn’t get too big. Will this win come back to haunt them? Minnesota Vikings – They got wrecked. Not a good sign facing a team they very well may play in their first game of the playoffs. WORD San Diego Chargers – Chugging along. The Chargers are good. … Read More »

I hate to admit it, but when I first started getting into college football back in the late 80s, Notre Dame was one of my two favorite teams (along with Michigan). I fell in love with Rocket Ismail. He was the best college football player I’d ever seen and is still 2nd on my list after Charles Woodson. I even bought a Toronto Argonauts CFL Ismail Jersey. College football is cyclical. The dominant programs of my childhood, Notre Dame, Michigan, … Read More »

Thanks everybody. FRESH TO DEATH Indianapolis Colts – Does anything faze this team? New Orleans Saints – What can we say? A totally dominant performance by Brees, Payton, Gregg Williams and the defense, the home crowd…almost perfect. John Carney kind of sucked. Minnesota Vikings – It might be getting a little too easy for them. Hopefully the Cardinals make it interesting this weekend. A potential 2nd round playoff match-up. WORD New England Patriots – Cannot be happy with that performance. … Read More »

You saw Multiplicity, right? So remember the 3rd clone that’s actually a clone of the 1st clone, which made the 3rd clone kind of retarded because the original DNA breaks down when you clone a clone (or something)? I think we might be looking at Don Nelson’s 3rd clone. He looks like Don Nelson, just, you know, kind of retarded. There’s no question Don Nelson is a hall of fame coach. Furthermore, his high-octane (sick term) up-tempo (double-hyphen) offensive system … Read More »

3 teams played in their former cities last week. Colts @ Baltimore Cardinals @ St. Louis Titans (formerly the Oilers) @ Houston Displaced teams went 3-0. FRESH TO DEATH Indianapolis Colts – They find a way to win. They’re 10-0, but they deserve to be 8-2. Still not sure they’re the best team in football though. They are definitely showing some vulnerability. New Orleans Saints – First time in a few games that they won instead of just avoiding losing. … Read More »

We’re coming strong out of the bye. There was an article in the Finance section of the NY Times about some super successful blogger. That’s called bulletin board material. Time for some action. FRESH TO DEATH Indianapolis Colts – Monstrous win. The only other undefeated team had trouble beating the lowly Rams. The Colts stuck it out against what is probably the second best team in the AFC. This comeback says a lot about the team’s character. Also, Reggie Wayne … Read More »

Seeing Chris Paul go down was unbearable. There’s a clip of him on the ground after he suddenly realized he was hurt. He threw his mouthpiece and said, “FUCK!” I concur. This guy has been busting his ass to try to make his team look half-decent. His averages so far this season: 26.1 points, 9.3 assists, 3.2 rebounds, 1.6 steals, 62.2% from the field, 85.7% from the line, and 65.5% from beyond the arc. DJ, could you bring that back? … Read More »

I wrote this before the Celtics dropped two straight to the Hawks and Pacers respectively: The Celtics look good. You know how big a lakers vs. celtics finals would be this year? Huge. But do you know how huge? You think it will be like 2008 because 2008 was huge. Wrong. A 2010 Lakers/Celtics finals would be twice or three times as big as 2008 because of the raised stakes. The Celtics didn’t have everyone healthy last year. With KG … Read More »

“I’m the question and the answer like Iverson.” – Jay-Z Raja Bell. Anthony Parker. Quinton Ross. Anthony Carter. Dahntay Jones. Mario Chalmers. Charlie Bell. Corey Brewer. Devin Brown. Larry Hughes. Thabo Sefolosha. Steve Blake. Beno Udrih. These are starting guards in the NBA. Allen Iverson is not. Something is wrong with this picture. A.I. still has something left in the tank, and potentially a lot more than that. He’s less than 2 years removed from playing a full 82 games, … Read More »

My friend went to the Cavs/Knicks game at MSG and called me on his way home from the game. I said the Knicks offense looked horrible. He said the Cavs not named LeBron were just as bad. The Knicks might have had a shot at that game if their big guys would have run the floor like the did in the 4th quarter when they went on a run to make it semi-interesting. The fact that they weren’t doing it … Read More »

We had a bye.

Scheduling committee came through big time in week 4: 1:00 pm – Baltimore @ New England 4:00 pm – New York Jets @ New Orleans Sun Night – San Diego @ Pittsburgh Mon Night – Green Bay @ Minnesota ill. FRESH TO DEATH New York Giants – They looked great against a bad team. That’s all right for now though. They don’t play a good team until the Saints in week 6 (in New Orleans…sick). Baltimore Ravens – McGahee leads … Read More »

Whatup? Me first. I’ve got stuff to tell you. It’s important. A lot of guys are on missions this year. Like Carmelo Anthony. That kid’s on a mission. He’s about to make the leap. The leap I told you all he would make when the playoffs started last year. He’s on a good team with a coach who knows how to lead (I’m referring, of course, to Chauncey Billups). You know the last time Melo was on a good team? … Read More »

It’s the midway point of the fantasy season (sort of), so let’s take a look at who the big dogs are moving forward on the run to the playoffs. The following is a top 10 list at each skill position of the guys I think will have the best season from this point on. Good luck to all…unless you’re in one of my leagues. QUARTERBACKS 1. Peyton Manning. Too consistent on a weekly basis to not be #1. 2. Tom … Read More »

Here’s a story about the 2009 MLB All-Star Game. (Are you bored yet?) It was the bottom of the 8th inning at Busch Stadium in St. Louis, Missouri when Ryan Howard stepped up to bat for the National League. There were 2 outs with runners on 2nd and 3rd. On the mound was Joe Nathan, closer for the Minnesota Twins, trying to protect a 4-3 American League lead. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “this story sucks.” Just hear … Read More »

Patriots and Buccaneers faced off in London this week. They should have more games in London. Like 16 games a season. And they should all be Rams vs. Browns. The game will not be televised. FRESH TO DEATH New Orleans Saints – Even though the Dolphins aren’t the best team the Saints have played, this game presented them with their toughest situation all season, trailing 24-3 late in the 2nd quarter. They pulled through. That’s a good sign for a … Read More »

Baseball season is long. It always has ups. It always has downs. And it is often impossible to figure out why, in a random midsummer series, things go the way they do. Hitters and pitchers regularly go on slumps and hot streaks. Players are sent down to and called up from the minor leagues. A trade from the American League to the National League will turn a scrub into a borderline all-star. That’s why the regular season is so long. … Read More »

CH: “Just whacked back 4 White Castle burgers while staring at a dynamic Killah Hills 10304 roster (Chris’ fantasy basketball team). So ill.” LH: “Working on the Week 6 post. Relatively ill.” Heeeeeere we go… FRESH TO DEATH New Orleans Saints – Believe it or not, we’re most impressed by their offensive line. Best pass rush in the league didn’t touch Drew Brees once and if you give Brees time he’ll pick any defense apart. Indianapolis Colts – They play … Read More »

49ers lose. They’re 3-2. Seahawks win. They’re 2-3. Cardinals win. They’re 2-2. Patriots lose. They’re 3-2. Jets lose. They’re 3-2. Dolphins win. They’re 2-3. Jets beat the Patriots. Dolphins beat the Jets. Where the hell did either of these 3-way division races come from? Week 5 wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. And now it’s about to get better… FRESH TO DEATH New York Giants – Have they played a good team yet? We definitely believe in … Read More »

So Tuesday night was the premiere episode of ESPN’s ‘30 for 30‘ series. The first documentary was titled ‘King’s Ransom’, by Peter Berg (creator of Friday Night Lights), about the trade of Wayne Gretzky from Edmonton to Los Angeles. (Side note: Can anyone tell me another thing about Edmonton besides ‘they have a hockey team’? Didn’t think so.) If this is the sign of things to come, consider us excited. Our favorite thing about the show was the access that … Read More »

Solid week 4 in the books. The big games lived up to the hype. We’re at that in-between point in the season where certain things begin to show signs of taking shape, while others are still confusing as shit. Either way, we can’t complain. It’s NFL…week #4. Let’s go. FRESH TO DEATH New York Giants – Manningham got a lot of love from the public the first 3 weeks (deservedly so considering the huge leap he has made in his … Read More »

A text message conversation about posting text message conversations: LH: I’m getting requests for more recent convos. CH: That would mean I’d need to converse with you more than normal-no.

Scheduling committee came through big time in week 4: 1:00 pm – Baltimore @ New England 4:00 pm – New York Jets @ New Orleans Sun Night – San Diego @ Pittsburgh Mon Night – Green Bay @ Minnesota ill. FRESH TO DEATH New York Giants – They looked great against a bad team. That’s all right for now though. They don’t play a good team until the Saints in week 6 (in New Orleans…sick). Baltimore Ravens – McGahee leads … Read More »

I heard someone say something along the lines of “the difference between Lane Kiffin and Rex Ryan is that Rex Ryan backs it up. You can’t talk trash if your team is 1-2.” Uh, why not? Don’t get me wrong. I think Lane Kiffin has been nothing but a jackass since arriving at Tennessee, but I don’t think that has anything to do with the fact that he didn’t “back up” his braggadocio. If Tennessee had beaten Florida in the … Read More »

Takin’ it from the top? Top. Tippy? Tippy. All my people… sing it daddy. FRESH TO DEATH New York Giants – Went from a questionable passing game to a potentially nasty 1-2 punch with Manningham and Smith (10 catches each). Little worried about Justin Tuck’s injury. Other than Brady, Peyton, and Roethlisberger, is there anyone else you’d rather have with the ball in their hands needing a score? Baltimore Ravens – 3 words: Ray muthafuckin’ Lewis. This team looks like … Read More »

Holy mackerel! (How come you never hear about regular, un-holy mackerel?) No intro necessary—same system as last week. This season is underway… FRESH TO DEATH Pittsburgh Steelers – Ben got a lot of pass protection against a good defense. Running game was atrocious though. A total of 25 attempts for 73 yards. Someone, whether it’s the backs or the line, needs to step up. New England Patriots – Was there anyone IN THE WORLD watching that game who didn’t think … Read More »

An email conversation comparing the end of method man’s verse in ‘as high as wu-tang get’ with the last words of socrates: LH: I know you’ve thought about this song so many times that if I were to estimate how many times you’ve thought about it I’d have to make up a number just for it to sound close, but I think I might have an ill tidbit that adds to its legacy. I’ve written a bunch of ill papers … Read More »

Are you ready for some Football? Yes, please. Crazy off-season. Lots of movement all around the league. Coaching changes. QB swaps. Retirements. Un-retirements. Even some prison time. The point is that the time has finally come for us to watch all of this hype play out. That’s right…September 13, 2009 is that other Good Sunday. And to sweeten the deal, we here at thehellerboyz.com have decided to give you exclusive access (tell your friends) to our 2009 NFL season preview. … Read More »

A text message conversation about the Wu-Tang Clan: LH: Shadowboxin might be the best song of all time. CH: I can’t argue with that statement-”my 3rd eye seen it comin-before it happen” LH: “Now everybody talkin bout they blasting-hmm-is you bustin steel or is you flashing-hmm.” CH: “Rap insomniac-fiend to catch a n*gga snoozin-slip to cardiac-arrest me-exorcist hiphop possess me-crunch a n*gga like a nestle-you know my steez”—–holy shit CH: “Outta whack-n*gga that-dont understand the facts-when it come to rza … Read More »

The NBA off-season has come and gone and the 09-10 season is upon us. The major players in the championship hunt were also the ones doing the most to improve their chances for this season, further strengthening the NBA hierarchy. To put it in simple terms, if one of the Lakers/Spurs/Celtics/Magic/Cavs don’t win the NBA title this season, something absolutely CRAZY would have to happen. Since all other teams are playing for early playoff exits, pride, lottery positioning, and to … Read More »

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A text message conversation about Charles Barkley: CH: I can’t comprehend charles barkley the ball player LH: Like he doesn’t make sense as a player? CH: yeah-6′4″ leading the league in rebs??? It’s just stupid LH: Bees should not be able to fly because their wings lack the surface area to support their bodies (learned that today in Bee Movie). It’s kind of like that. CH: show off

Assembling a good basketball team is a science. Assembling a great basketball team is an art, if not a miracle. I’d say the same about making a good rap album vs. making a great rap album. I don’t believe in a formula for greatness. I think genius is inspirational, but not imitable. I’m starting to worry about Blueprint 3. Not because I think it’s going to be bad, but because I think it’s not going to be great. Let me … Read More »

I’m a huge dog lover. Not gonna get into what I think deserved to happen to Mike Vick (but if you listen to the beginning of ‘Method Man’ on 36 Chambers you’ll have an idea; tag words being ‘ass cheeks’, ‘nuts’, ‘spiked fuckin bat’, ‘rusty screwdriver’). Here’s what I can’t seem to grasp. How does the ASPCA (or the like) figure that Vick should be the ‘voice’ against animal cruelty?? Isn’t he the least qualified person in the world for … Read More »

“I’ve got a feeling in my bones.” “I’m going with my gut.” “Gotta follow my heart here.” I’m tired of all those statements, so here are thoughts and predictions for the upcoming fantasy football season I’m pulling out of my ass: Aaron Rodgers will finish as the #1 QB, but I’ll still draft Tom Brady ahead of him because of the upside potential Darren McFadden and Michael Bush will both finish as top-20 RBs DeAngelo Williams (a.k.a. Brown Sugar) was … Read More »